Catharsis

Catharsis is what I'd forgotten that blogging provides. I have tried several times to make a blog, write a diary, keep a journal but all attempts have been flawed by my sense of having to impress people, to propagate it for others entertainment. It's only been a week, yet I have discovered what I needed a blog for.

It's for all the things that are on my mind, to be able to pull them out and stick them in a post on a pretentiously titled online journal. It's for my sanity which always rocks back and forth on the sea of madness, threatening to sink. It's for the health of my hands, which simply can't keep up with whats on my mind with a pen in them and the fact that I should write everyday to hone my skills by putting a part of me out there, near hidden, but still there.

My previous exploits at blogging had imaginative titles such as 'soul pollution' but truthfully irrelevant posts to me, I mean, who wants to know that the only day of the week that has an anagram is Monday? (Dynamo if you're interested). Despite the unimportant and muchly-thought-about posts, the seeds of honesty and the self-service that blogging really is were present in smatterings...

'27th December 2007

PISS PAINS!

Let me set the scene for you:

Greenwich Theater, an average panto is on the stage directly in front of you and you have had a few beers. There is a little bit of a signal that you need to go to the toilet, but you can control it for now.

20 minutes later and you're sweating, you can feel it beating down the door. Your left leg starts twitching insanely and your suddenly gripped by the fear that if you hold on any longer your bladder will actually burst inside your body.

So you sit there and, even though you've been told to not go to the toilet during it, you get up and jump, run, all sorts of movements down to the toilet. In there you experience an out of body moment that you will remember forever as the piss is streaming out like a waterfall.

Well, I thought it was interesting'

That had to have been one of the worst experiences of my life and yet one of the funniest but my oh my have I grown up since then. I still see life as a huge batch of material ready to be turned into a joke, but I suppose now that I'm actually tasting life and am somewhat less of a sociopath I'm funnier. Subtler. My writing skills have matured, my ego has been hit from all sides...to put it simpler, since then...i've lived. Now I know It's good to have a moan, it's great to have a joke and it's even better to shove it all online, knowing that it's your little secret, which only you can choose yourself to show people, rather than something specifically designed for you to link to people hoping they'll see it and find it funny.

Well, that's my little piece on the benefits of blogging and long may my attachment to this one last. In 10 years time I hope to look back on this and see what a twat I was, but a twat who could express himself and was unashamed or perhaps unaware that he was one.

Keep Blogging (to whoever reads this)

JPH